Braces, cysts, and jobs.....OH MY!!

I stood at the door this morning watching my boys get on the bus, knowing that I would not be home for the first time when they get off the bus this afternoon. That is not a good feeling. You see, I got a job. Not because I wanted one, but because I needed one. Atleast for now. Who knows what the future will bring.

Things have just really been piling up over here. Monte got his braces, (isn't he adorable) Hunter has a cyst in his mouth that is being removed tomorrow (neither are covered under our insurance) my car broke down Thursday night on my way home, my car and hubby's both need new tires, BAD, not to mention Christmas is almost here. You get the picture. So a part time (retail) job is what I got. We have sacrificed and done without many times, but this time there just really wasn't any other option. (believe me, this decision wasn't made over night)

I keep reminding myself that for 10 years I have been able to stay home. That is much longer than a lot of mommy's out there, but that doesn't really make it any easier. The baby is still so little, and still nursing. There will be days like this when I will only see the boys for an hour before school. And I feel bad that my hubby has to get up at 4:30am to go to work, and then come home and be mom and dad to 3 boys, ending his day when the baby goes to bed. I guess this is just another sacrifice we will make.

I've cried and cried. It's not so much working that upsets me, it's leaving the boys. I've never had to. I hardly ever even go anywhere. I even started to cry at my first interview. Yes, I'm a dork, but she was really understanding being a mom who stayed home with her kids for 10 years. I cried as I nursed the baby just a little bit ago, and then laid him down for his nap. And I'm sorta crying right now. I just hope I don't cry all over a customer tonight.